How I Have Changed

While at Fall Orientation in September the Rebounds were given a long list of  "I statements". Each one was a way in which we might have changed over the past year. They said things like; "I have become fluent in a new language" or "I have become more independent" 

We were told to go through the list and check only those that made sense to us and then go through it one more time and pick out just a few that resonated true the most with us. After choosing the most important ones to us we were told to explain why. This is the essay of sorts that I ended up with. I was asked to read it at the Rotary meeting tomorrow morning, and then I remembered that I have sort of been neglecting my blog and I thought you all might want to read it, so here goes... keep in mind this was the hand written version I wrote at Orientation, no editing so there are bound to be a few mistakes :)

#8 I have a clearer notion of what I want to do with my life.

Before I left for exchange, sure, I love to travel and I knew I wanted to go to college one day and have a family later on, but truly I had no idea about the person I wanted to be or the things I wanted to do. After exchange I feel much more directed and this is entirely due to one weekend on exchange which opened my eyes to what really makes me happy, to what makes me feel successful. I was invited to help teach at an English camp and of course, following the "just say yes to all opportunities" exchange student mantra I readily accepted. Little did I know that this three day camp would have such a direct impact on helping me realize what I want to accomplish in my life.

 During camp we were split into groups, one or two teachers with eight students. All of the students were from hill tribes and the majority were orphans and lived year round at the school. In my group there was one girl, in particular who had a lot of difficulty even with the simplest parts of the lesson. At the end of the first day of camp I was worried that she hadn't enjoyed herself and that perhaps she was having a really difficult time. After dinner and a few group camp activities we were all heading off to bed. Just before I left, the girl from my group came and found me. She spoke to me in Thai, but the words she said were so much more important than the fact that she didn't say them to me in English. She said "I'm so glad you cam because now I don't have to be lonely anymore. I had a lot of fun today and I can't wait for tomorrow." I was speechless. Not only had she disproved my negativity about whether or not she had been enjoying the camp, she had said something else. She had said that I had made a difference in her life and that meant the world to me. I gave her a hug and told her that I too was glad I had come and glad I had met her and excited for tomorrow. I wished her sweet dreams and goodnight and she left. But then something else came to my attention; many other students, young and old, had gathered around. And suddenly I realized something, none of them had their parents to tuck them in, to wish them sweet dreams and I knew at that moment that if it took me my entire life I would hug each and every one of them goodnight. I would wish them sweet dreams, I would be there for them. When camp ended, I was distraught. How could this be over? But then I realized something, it's never over. There will always be someone who needs a hug, a smile, or someone to talk to and I will always be that person. I want to spend my life helping people in need and this camp was only the beginning. 

--

So that's that. Definitely need a shout out for Kathleen Madden if she's reading this! She's the one who organized and invited me to the English camp. Definitely life changing in all the right ways. Thanks!

Anyways, the snow has fallen here and I am loving it... for now! Twenty four hours in and I've already had a snowball fight, made a snowman, drank hot chocolate and been slightly sorta kinda in the ditch! Welcome Winter! I've missed you! 

hugs, 

kearn

This is my group at camp. All of these kids taught me something different and I love them and can't thank them enough for what they have shown me <3

One year ago today...

One year ago today, I left on the biggest adventure I've ever taken. 

Before I left Alaska, Thailand was a dream to me. While I was in Thailand, Alaska was the dream and now, once again, Thailand feels like a dream. I've been back in Alaska for almost one entire month now and not a single day goes by when I don't think of Thailand. I have a whole life there- a family, friends and so many memories. There were certainly hard days and there were nights when I couldn't sleep, but there are so many amazing relationships that I've  formed this past year, innumerable exciting opportunities for adventure every single day,  so many people, places, memories and feelings that I will never ever forget.  One year ago today, my adventure as an exchange student started. 

Honestly, it's hard for me to feel as though the adventure still continues. Now that I've returned to Alaska; to Palmer, to my family and friends, school and life here it certainly feels over.  I seem to be good at forgetting the fact that the adventure is never over. Last year, being an exchange student was my adventure. But truly, life in and of itself is always an adventure. So for now, I'm just reminding myself everyday, that life is the biggest adventure a person can ever take. This year isn't just another year, or just the year after my exchange or just my Senior year of high school. No, this year is my next adventure.

Home is where the heart is.

I feel as though the last few times I've written I haven't really shared many details about my adventures of late. The reason for that is not for lack of having adventures or things to write about but rather that there are so many millions of things I have been doing, learning, seeing and feeling that it would be impossible to write them all down without going on for pages and pages and hours and hours, so I shall save the majority of those for later... when I can share them with you on a rainy Alaskan summer day over a cup of steaming tea.

I imagine this may be the last time I post for a while and perhaps my very last post from Thailand (which makes me incredibly sad), though I do plan to post sporadically during my return year in Alaska. 

Out of the twenty-eight people in my District 3350 family almost ten have gone back to their home countries already. It's strange realizing the possibility that all twenty-eight of us might never be all together again. In around a month's time I too will be back in home country. Back in Alaska. Driving down those streets... seeing all those people... doing all those things I used to do. But I won't be there fully... I'm afraid I might never be there fully. I know already that when I leave Thailand I will not only leave friends and family, but also half of my heart.

If "home" is where the heart is, and I call two places across the world from each other "home"... does that make me heartbroken? 

Soon enough, I'll be leaving "home" to go "home". Saying goodbye to my District 3350 family to say hello to my District 5010 one. Saying goodbye to my friends, to say hello to my friends. Leaving my Thai family to go back to my biological one. I can't believe this year... this amazing, wonderful, magnificent year... this year that has had it's rough patches but always pulled through to the good times, this year that taught me so much about myself, this year that I failed more than once during, but stood back up again and succeeded.... this fantastic, incredible year that words cannot even describe, I cannot believe that this year is almost over. Truly, I could not be more grateful to everyone and everything that has contributed to this year in even the tiniest way. 

Thank you for telling me I'm beautiful. Thank you for keeping me well fed. Thank you for teaching me patience, for showing me real confusion and letting me conquer it, for empowering me to believe that if I am persistent I can overcome the difficulties the world throws at me. Thank you for hugging me when I cried. Thank you for laughing at my jokes even if they weren't funny. Thank you for being patient with me when I struggled with language.  Thank you for teaching me, for caring about me, for spending time with me. Thank you for listening, for helping. 

Thank you to the oversize beetles in the bathroom for making those times that I wake up in the middle of the night that much more exciting. Thank you to the geckos for giving me something to watch at boring dinner parties. Thank you to the heat for teaching me to appreciate the cold, to the rain for teaching me to dance. 

Thank you to the entire peppers I ate by choice for a competition, for being spicy... but not spicy enough to scare me into not do it a second time. Thank you to rice... for understanding that week where I broke up with you, it only made our relationship that much stronger. Thank you rice for being there when the other food was all scary and/or not delicious. And thank you rice for letting me bare your name... I wear it with pride.

Thank you Skype for letting me light the Hannukkah menorah all the way from Thailand. Thank you mail for letting me realize the true joy a letter or package can bring. 

Thank you distance, for making me realize what a wide world it is. Thank you to this year, for making me realize that no matter how small I am, I can affect the world if I try.

Thank you darkened windows for giving me something to stare out on those nights when I was lonely. 

Thank you sunshine for spilling in in the morning to wake me up in time to enjoy every single new and amazing day.

Thank you friends for coming to me for advice and for being there when I needed you. 

Thank you housemaid for always washing and ironing my clothes. Thank you to the Thai way of washing underwear by hand for teaching me to appreciate the American... throw it all in the washing machine together technique. 

Thank you to my host family, for loving me. Thank you Rotary for sponsoring me. Thank you everyone, for accepting me. Thank you to the exchange students of D3350, and especially to the Lopburi Kids, for being truly, one-hundred percent, the best friends I have ever had.

Thank you for every single thing on this list and all the other things that are not, but most of all, thank you for making it so ridiculously hard to say goodbye. 

Seriously, thank you.

ข้าวหอม
Kearney

Sand

The past two months have literally flown by. I feel as though every time I look at the calendar a tiny grain of sand settles in the bottom of my stomach. Realizing the small amount of time I have left as an inbound exchange student scares me.
Yesterday I dropped one of my closest friends off at the airport. Jon has become an older brother to me this year and there is no doubt that it was difficult to say goodbye. Yet, it wasn’t until after he stepped off the top of the escalator, backpack on, passport in hand, turned away and disappeared out of sight that it all began to hit me.
 Alex turns to me, “Did Jon just leave?” she asks in voice that almost pleads me to tell her it’s not true.
I don’t even have the energy to nod, the grains of sand in my stomach have turned into one solid rock in the pit of my stomach. We wrap into a tight hug as the tears rain down from my face. He is the first of my close friends to leave and the realization that slowly my family of exchange students is separating hits me like a frying pan to the forehead. Soon enough we will all be back in our home countries, far apart from one another, far away from Thailand. Soon enough we will all go back to those old lives that we lived before we knew each other. The same houses, the same towns… but it will never be truly the same. Nothing will ever be truly the same.

All I can say is thank you. Thank you to every single exchange student in District 3350 for being a friend to me. You have all influenced me in ways that maybe even you do not know. I truly value every single second of time that I spend with you. Though our time as inbounds in Thailand may be nearing a close, lets not call this goodbye, let’s call it see you later… because one day, I’ll

visit you. In Europe, in Asia, North and South America. See you in Australia too. ♫

Lopburi Kids <3
All the exchange students who lived in Lopburi this year (and Lydia who is drawn on the peice of paper because she couldn't be there)

I love you guys <3

I love you big brother!

empty escalator... 

 

All of us at our very first orientation, we've come so far. I love you guys <3

Time is flying.

Well, last time I posted was about a month ago... time is really flying now.

I'm pacing. Back and forth, back and forth. It's time now. They've landed. Where are they?! I see them! The bright raspberry red of my mom's shirt stands out in my mind, I run towards them. Tears spring into my eyes as I find myself in my mother's warm embrace.

It was amazing to see my parents. We had a wonderful time swimming and bathing elephants, snorkeling, seeing the magnificent Angkor Wat in Cambodia and just spending time together. I especially loved showing them around my hometown and having them meet my host families.

Well, I'm sorry I won't write much more now. Like I said, time is flying and I just want to soak up every second that I have left in Thailand because before I know it I will be heading back home.

Kearn

They made it!

Sitting on the cold, greyish white airport floor, staring up at the arrivals board as it flips to English, to Thai, then back to English again. It seems unreal... the reason I'm here. Yet... I check the time, one minute until landing. A wide grin spreads across my face. I glance back up at the arrivals board.

LANDED.

Welcome to Thailand, Mom and Dad!

The Best Day of my Life

North Trip!

I just got back from my trip to the North with all the other exchange students in my district (Space Peopls what we call ourselves) and all the Thai outbound students (one of whom is going to Alaska next year—shout out to Mew!). We saw tons of historical sights, went to the old capital of Thailand—Sukothai, visited the Golden Triangle, the famous White Temple (Wat Rungkun), saw two beautiful pagodas that were built in the mountains for the King and Queen, walked through many beautiful gardens, went to a few museums, a hot spring, a gorgeous and enormous waterfall, a painted fan village and a ceramics factory. All of those wonderful things and I still haven’t even listed my favorite three!

So here goes…

First, on April 11^th after visiting the gorgeous White Temple, sticking our feet and hard boiling eggs in the scorching water of the Mae Kajarn Hot Spring  we headed to the province of Chiang Mai where we visited the  Chiang Mai Zoo. Zoos are just awesome to begin with, and even more so when you are with your best friends and you get to see your favorite animal in the whole wide world! Those of you who know me well enough will know what that is…

Secondly, we all got to celebrate the Thai holiday Songkran on April 13th! Though Songkran used to be more of a family holiday in which people would go and visit grandparents and elders and be sprinkled in holy water, over time it has evolved and changed into modern day Songkran which is basically just three days (this year it was April 13-16) where everyone in Thailand stops, drops everything their doing, closes up shop and heads out into the street for a country-wide water and squirt gun fight! Songkran was simply amazing! Everyone in the whole country out to have a water fight on one of the hottest days of the year… perfect.

Thirdly, April 12^th may just have been the best day of my life up to this point. We started the day with watching the adorable elephants at Maetang Elephant Park play soccer, dance and paint beautiful pictures with their trunks! During the show an elephant presented my friend Turi with a basket of flowers! While standing around waiting for the show to begin, I got kissed by an elephant… well… more like it stuck its trunk on my face and got me all slobbery… that doesn’t happen everyday! After the show we took a ride in a cart pulled by two oxen, some early birds had already started playing Songkran, but luckily we didn’t get splashed… yet, we road the oxen to another area where we transferred from the low to the ground oxen carts to the high back of an elephant. I rode the elephant with my friend Lea, from Germany. As we walked through the forest bumping and jolting from side to side neither of us could stop smiling. We finally came to a river… which our elephant walked straight into and started to spray us a bit with water from it’s trunk. Let Songkran begin! Sitting on an elephant walking in a river through the mountains and forests of Northern Thailand was one of the most amazing and best things I have ever done in my entire life. After we returned to the elephant enclosure we got off, thanked our Mahout (elephant trainer) and elephant and we were off once again, this time we had a bamboo raft as our mode of transportation. Seven other exchange students from USA, France and Germany--Sophie, Willis, Jon, Turi, Alex, Tom, Maieul-- and I, our awesome Rotex Pick, one of our tour guides and two Thai boat men all floated together. As we started Pick asked “So… do you guys want to play Songkran?” “YES!” we all agreed. And so we splashed and screamed and sang our way down the river. The raft man let me steer the back while my friend Tom from France steered the front, we made a good team but unfortunately we were too slow so we let the raft man steer instead. By the time we got back, wet from splashing each other and being splashed by random Thai children and families swimming in the river we were all more than content. We headed to Bor Sang Umbrella village where we watched women hand paint on umbrellas, fans, papers and anything else you can imagine. My friend Saeko, from Japan, and I both got things painted on our cameras, Jonas from Germany got his wallet painted on and Helen and Ariel from Canada and Taiwan got their clothing painted on.  It was a fantastic and tiring day and we were all glad to be back at the hotel and take a shower… but no rest here because that evening we were off to a traditional Thai dance show where we sat on the floor and ate dinner while listening to live Thai music and watching the beautiful dances from all corners of Thailand. The day ended with staying up into the early hours of the morning talking with friends, a perfect way to end a perfect day.

The last night of the trip we sung karaoke, talked and danced. For some reason I was feeling kind of saddened by it all and so, when four of the Outbound girls came out with a cake and a big poster saying “We Love Inbounds!” with a silly face that matched each inbound’s personality drawn on it and then sang a song for us all, I’m sure I was the first one crying… but I wasn’t the only one. Luckily someone started a cake in the face fight and that wiped away all of our tears. After jumping in the pool the clean off we all stayed up late talking through the very last night of the trip.

We are meant to have a goodbye party sometime in mid June, but unfortunately some Inbounds probably will have left already… I didn’t realize at the time that that may have been the last time we are all together… ever.

I cannot thank Rotary enough for having these amazing trips for us and for giving me the opportunity to have this amazing year. I cannot believe how much my life has changed in the past 250 days. I will never, ever forget the memories of the Rotary trips and the friendships I have made with all the Space People of D3350 will definitely last forever.

I love Thailand! I love my exchange student family! I love life!

Here is the link to the photos of the North Trip ---> Adventures in the North

Hope you are all well.

Kearn

A new 7-11?!

On Thursday Alex and I went to Bangkok to meet up with Sophie, Turi and Crystle.
Sophie had her first Mexican food and we all walked around and went shopping. That night Turi, Alex and I all spent the night at Sophie's house. In the morning we took motorcycle taxis to the bus stop and then went to Central Plaza, a shopping mall, where we ate Krispy Kremes, D(insert 'o' with little dots on top here)ner and watched the movie The Host which was a really good movie and also, for us, a comfy one because we all cuddled. Back to Lop Buri to find that there is a NEW, yes NEWWWW 7-11. You really know you've been in Thailand a while when you actually care about the fact that there is a new 7-11 in your town. I mean... it's not that 7-11's are rare, in fact, they are the complete opposite, there are three within a 5 minute walk from my house, it's the fact that there is a new one... in Lop Buri... in my town! I think it's the fact that I've been here long enough to see the changes as the city develops. Strange, strange... and now I must go visit the new 7-11 because it most certainly is not just like all the others, right? It is especially nothing like the one across the street from it and down about 200 meters away now is it.

Rabbit Rabbit Swordfish!

I'm not sure which way it was... but in either my mom or dad's family when they were a kid they said "rabbit rabbit" on the first of the month and in the other family they said "swordfish swordfish" therefore in my family we've always said "rabbit rabbit swordfish!" I said it once while with my group of exchange students and no one understood so I figured it deserved an explanation! Anyways, Happy April Fools Day to everyone! I hope you had some fun with pranks or were pranked! Though I was not pranked and did not prank anyone, April 1st was the date that the prank war between four exchange student girls (Alex, Turi, Sophie, me) and four exchange student boys (Willis, Andre, Luca, Matt) was established. Next week is our Districts trip to the North so I promise I will update you later on all the silly jokes that go on! For now, here is an account of some fun things that happened on the District South Trip!

March 26

My host family owns a van rental company so at about 2pm all of us Lop Buri kids and a few others leave for Bangkok. We meet the others in Bangkok and by 6pm we are on our awesome VIP double decker bus and offff! The first hours are excited, loud, chattering and rambunctious! Slowly people begin to quiet down, tire out and drift off to sleep. 

March 27

At about 8am I open my eyes, I try and try to focus them but I can't. All I see is a strange blue, moving mass before my eyes. Within about a minute the bus lights are turned on and our funny Thai tour guide tells us that we have arrived! Oh... I put two and two together... blue wavy mass = the ocean. We check in to our hotel which is barely a five minute walk from the beach and take showers, half an hour later we are back on the bus, breakfasted and wearing our swimsuits under our clothes. We spend the day taking a small boat just big enough for our group of exchange students around the islands of Krabi, stopping for an hour here and an hour there. Swimming, swimming, swimming! That evening we walk around at the night market street and Alex and I go to a shop and get our hair done into a million tiny braids. We plan to keep them for the entire trip. After two hours we are only about 10 minutes late for dinner, that night we take a walk on the beach and finally roll into bed only to wake up in the morning to another day in paradise.

March 28

We take the bus to a hot spring, but it's not like the hot springs I've been to before, water coming out of the ground and creating a pool of warm water, no this is a hot waterfall! The many levels of the waterfall can fit one, two or even six or seven people in them and if you get to hot you can always slip on down and land in the cold river water below. We splash and play for almost an hour, even though supposedly one should only stay for 20 minutes... no more and no less. Later that day we go to The Emerald Pool. To get to the pool you must take about a fifteen minute walk through the beautiful jungle. It was very pretty and of course we all went swimming again! That evening we drove to Pang Nga and stayed at a hotel with a beautiful view of the river. We went swimming in the pool, dove around, took crazy photos, I once again stubbed my old fractured big toe and everyone got some betadine and bandaids for all the cuts from the rocks on the beaches.  

March 29th

We took a boat from the pier infront of our hotel and visited James Bond Island. I've never seen the movie that was filmed there so that is on the list of to do's now! While there, a few friends and   I explored some caves and disturbed a few bats. Later that day we took the boat to a tiny village of about 200 households on a tiny island. Most people living there were Muslim and they were in the process of building a mosque. There we ate lunch and walked around. We saw the floating soccer field... the rules are that whoever kicks the ball off has to jump in a go get it! Then we donated a bunch of mosquito nets, a water filtration system and some snacks and candy to the local school. A few of us played soccer with some small Thai children... I sort of sunburned the bottom of my feet from this but it was totally worth it. I spoke to a group of girls and learned that many of them did not know how to swim... that surprised me. Also while talking to a woman there we learned that her pet gibbon's name was Turi! The lady let our friend Turi hold the gibbon and we took lots of pictures, even though usually the photos are 50 baht the woman didn't make us pay. Turi was pretty overjoyed. How often do you go to a tiny island with 200 households and find a gibbon with the same name as you? Once in a lifetime for sure. That night we checked into a really beautiful hotel, we played in the pool and then went to dinner. Dinner is a whole other story... now we can get foreign food, sort of, but nothing good and nothing thats not ridiculously expensive so when we walked in to see that the food was an International All You Can Eat Buffet you can probably imagine what happened next. After eating ourselves into what we like to call a "chicken hangover" (the chicken was really, really, really delicious), we rested for a bit before going out to the walking street market to buy some new bracelets and look around.

March 30

In the morning we headed to Phi Phi Island. On the two hour boat ride we met some nice people, especially one couple from Brazil who were travelling all over the world. We ate lunch at Phi Phi Island and then went snorkeling. It was absolutely beautiful. Our chaperone started feeding the fish and there were so many of them and so close together that they were swimming into us! That night we all got a bit dressed up and went to Phuket FantaSea which is an amazing show of Thai dance, magic, other dance, elephants and all sorts of animals! My favorite was the group of about fourteen or so trapeze artists swinging and twirling in the air above us while everything was dark except for their neon outfits. My friend Lea and I walked to The Hard Rock Cafe Phuket later but everything was way to expensive so we couldn't even get a pin for our blazer. Later we walked around at the street market again and we jumped into the ocean after midnight to celebrate Sophie's 17th birthday! 

March 31

We swam at the pool, gave birthday gifts to Sophie, went shopping a bit more and finally started the long bus ride back home. On the bus we watched The Sound Of Music and Turi, Daniel and I all sang along. The chaperone had prepared a cake, so we all sang and Sophie blew out her candles on the top of a double decker bus somewhere between Phuket and Bangkok.

It was an absolutely amazing week and I couldn't have asked for any more wonderful people to spend it with than the awesome Spacepeople (inbound students of District 3350), few outbounds who went and our awesome Rotex-- Coco and Ohm! Thanks for everything, especially the goodnight hugs! :)

Also, here is the link to the album of my photos from the trip-- Krabi, Phuket, Phi Phi and more!

and here is the link to my youtube-  Kearney on Youtube!

Kearn

Generosity

I poke her flat stomach, she playfully falls to the floor but quickly leaps back up. Pointing at my shirt she exclaims "ling! monkey!" I smile, "yes!". Then she twirls away, slips on her high heel, magenta, flower adorned, plastic shoes and dances across the room with a rhythmic tip tap. She stops by the new office chair and points... "gleen!" she proclaims, mixing up the "l" sound with the "r" sound as the majority of Thais do. I smile... "yes! excellent job!". And in this fashion she keeps dancing, skipping, tapping across the room finding colors and exclaiming them in her tiny, sweet voice. Her energy seems never ending, she can't sit still long enough to peel up a sticker from her sticker book so instead she stands, leaning on the table moving her legs and chattering away to herself. "Which one do you like P'Kaohom?" she asks. They are Disney stickers from Toy Story... I smile, pretend to think real hard about it and then point to a little square sticker with Rex, the dinosaur, on it. I look away for a moment and when I turn around her little hand is outstretched towards me, the Rex sticker on the tip of her finger. I smile. This is generosity.

Harlem Shake

The last day that I stayed with my last host family my host dad asked me if there was anything special I wanted to do the night before I left. All I could think was... the Harlem Shake of course! So here it is! (Two of my host siblings couldn't be in it, thanks to my oldest host brother for making the video!)

In case you don't know what the Harlem Shake is, it is... well... it's easier not to explain so he is one of the first Harlem Shakes....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4hpEnLtqUDg

Here is my family's Harlem Shake... Host Family Harlem

Even Grandma got in on the action! Or rather... didn't get in on the action...

kearn

New Familyyy

I spent the three days after I was in Bangkok with the Bechtolds at home. I hung out with my host family and soaked up every minute of it. I finally decided on Wednesday that since I was moving in the morning I had better get a start on packing up all my things. It ended up only taking about 2 hours -- two suitcases, two bags, a box and a trophy without a container to fit inside. The car ride was short and I kept my eyes glued out the window trying to hide the fact that silent tears were rolling down my cheeks. I tried not to cry, but as I left my mom and dad it was impossible. I was extremely welcomed into my new host family though. They own a very large van rental company and have four workers working in their office in the front room of the house, all of them were very talkative. I moved my things into my room, it's a super cozy room and I absolutely love it! That night my new family took me to a shopping mall and even bought me a new swim suit for my Rotary trip to the South which is at the end of this month! Two nights at my new family's home and I was away from home again though, on Saturday morning I headed to another province (Angtong) where I met about 15 other exchange students and spent Saturday and Sunday learned traditional Thai dances from all four regions of Thailand. We will practice once more next weekend and then be presenting our dances at District Conference at the end of this month. I am very excited! Just a few days after District Conference all the Inbound will be heading off on our first Rotary trip to the South of Thailand! I couldn't be more excited! Well, that's all for now, talk to you later!

Oh wait, oh wait! Happy Birthday to the best big brother in the world! I love you Riley! Happy 21st birthday today! <3

Here are some photos from my weekend in Angtong ----> Dance Camp

Kearn

Check Out

I'm staring at a little green light. On. Off. On. Off. Sitting in the second floor kitchen you can look out the open window into the high ceiling garage where my host dads car air conditioning fixing shop is. I'm watching the light of the machine where the workers use their fingerprints to check in in the morning and check out at night. Upstairs, my suitcases are packed... ready to be carried down tomorrow morning. My heart is heavy. Tomorrow morning I'll be checking out. Checking out for good. 

In other words, tomorrow is moving day. I'm moving to my final host family. They seem like very kind people and I think I will be very happy living with them, but I can't deny the sadness I feel about leaving my current host family. I truly cannot thank the entire Pitakpanichkul family enough for taking me in and treating me as truly a daughter, little sister and part of the family. 

No matter how many times I say thank you, it will never be enough.

Bechtolds in Bangkok!

The other exchange student who I am closest friends with here is named Alex, she is from Oregon, this week her mom and little sister (Madison) are in Thailand to see her! I went with Alex to the airport to pick them up and spent a few days in Bangkok with them. Before we picked them up at the airport I got to see River and Whitney who are the other two exchange students from Alaska, they are staying in the Northern district so we do not see each other, luckily they happened to be in Bangkok on their Central Rotary Trip when I was on Thursday! It was great to see some familiar faces! Also I tasted my first hamburger in about seven months... bacon cheeseburger... it was pretty delicious. Alex and I shared it so technically we still haven't eaten a whole hamburger this year! We hung out with some other friends in Bangkok and also got to meet students from the other Rotary districts in Thailand... and I saw one guy who I talked with on the plane here and never saw again! It was all a pretty great day and in the evening, Alex and I headed to the airport. We ate dinner and of course dyed Alex's hair in the airport bathroom... that confused the cleaning ladies. Once the time for the arrival of Alex's family got closer and closer we both started getting pretty impatient... she a bit more so than me. We played cards to pass the time until finally I thought I saw the shape of her mother and sister through the not quite see through partition...

"Alex! Alex! I think I see them! Look, in the green shirt!"
"Well... my mom does like green..."

Unfortunately when the pair rounded the corner and came into view it turned out to be an elderly man and his small wife... not Alex's mom and little sister. False Alarm. A few minutes later I really thought I saw them...

"Alex! I see them! I really think it's them this time!"
"Noo... not yet, well maybe..." *looks up and looks through the partition, screams and runs off*

Alex practically knocked her poor mom over from running at her and hugging her. It was quite a sweet reunion! I felt like I sort of already knew them from seeing photos and hearing stories, so I gave them both a welcome hug too!

From there we headed to our hotel and were off to sleep. In the morning we were off for some Bangkok touring! We went and saw many temples, got massages and road in a tuk tuk on Friday. Then came home, exhausted, and went into the cold water hot tub on the roof of our cozy hotel. It was quite fun and we even saw some stars in the city! The next day we woke up early and went to a floating market and the JJ market which is a famous, enourmous, market where you can buy anything from pet monkeys, to jade Bhudda statues to pants, to bags with American flags on them to... well basically anything you want, including fresh orange juice and delicious foods. In the taxi between the floating market and JJ Alex and I composed a story in Thai because Madison (Alex's little sister) asked us to. Our story involved puppy eating snakes and a mother who was a ninja and saved her baby daughter. It was a pretty crazy story and when we finished we realized the taxi driver probably understood everything we said... that was a funny but sort of awkward moment.

Dear Taxi Driver in Bangkok,
Yes, we are crazy.
Love,
Alex and Kearney

After a sticky, hot day of shopping I headed off taking the BTS (sky train) a few stations and then the van two and a half hours back home to Lop Buri while the Bechtolds headed to the airport to go to Phuket!

Also, we had to have a few servings of sticky rice and mangoes... the most delicious dessert I have ever eaten in my life.

Sweet mangoes (which are in season right now) and sweet sticky rice with coconut sauce on top.









Here is the link to my photos of the past few days--> Bangkok with the Bechtolds!

xoxo Kearn

Update update update!

Here is an update... so much has happened since I last wrote but I will divide it into about four parts!

Number One - Chinese New Year
My whole family was up, awake, showered and out the door just before 3am. We went to four different places where we brought big offering plates of fruit and meat and also had cups of both water and alchohol. We waiied--prayed and asked or wished for things to come to us in the future year. It was an amazing experience. We waied once in town where there were many other families waing at the same time, then once at the large statue of King Narai in our town and then once at a tiny roadside monk obviously not well known and then once outside the front of our house. The next day I slept in late... and when I woke up my host cousin Mai was there with her mom and dad! That night at about 8pm we drove to the next town over Khok Samrong and at about 9pm we started walking up a mountain. It has something like almost 4,000 steps until you reach the top! It was hot and there were tons of people, it is very good luck if you are able to make it to the top of this mountain. Mai and I finally made it,  preceded by my host brother and sister and followed by my host moms and aunt and uncle. At the top there was a beautiful temple and we waiied in multiple places. Then we took another short stairwayed walk to another small one room temple where there was a monk sitting and in the center of the room a large gold colored elephant. You must wai first and wish or ask one thing, then, you must try to lift the elephant. If you can lift the elephant, your wish will come true. Let me tell you, the elephant was extremely heavy! But I lifted it! After the climb back down everyone was exhausted and my cousin (who was staying in my room with me) and I barely stayed awake long enough to shower before falling to sleep. Oh and I almost forgot-- it is tradition for Chinese parents (my host dad is Chinese so this is why I got to celebrate this holiday... I feel very lucky!) to give children money on Chinese New Years... so I am $60 richer! :)

Number Two- King Narai Festival
Because Lop Buri was founded on the old palace of the Great King Narai each year, just in Lop Buri, there is a grand festival in his honor. In the festival there is a huge historical reenactment. The other exchange students and I were asked to act as French Ambassadors in the play, it was quite fun, but also quite hot! The reenactment was absolutely amazing though! As was the rest of the festival... I went to the festival every night... which ended up in me being sick now... but now the festival is over so I can get better now! It was so worth it! Singers and dancers and booths selling silks and jewelry and an AMAZING handmade bag that I fell in love with but had to break up with when I found out it was 4800 baht (aka 160 dollars). And of course, the most gorgeous display of lights ever -- it felt like Christmas in the city... even though I've never been to Christmas in the city...

Number Three- Pibulwittayalai Graduation
My school had graduation for M6 (equivalent of 12th grade). It was such a new experience, so different from America! Each class walked in just with the members of their class (unlike America, the class stays together to study every subject from 9th grade up until 12th) walked in under the school color flags while the band played the schools marching song. They were adorned with sashes, flower crowns, gifts, pins, smiles and of course... their school uniforms. They haven't gotten rid of those yet (in fact most universities in Thailand also enforce uniforms). Graduation was fun, sort of chaotic-- with music and dancing and people running to and fro, photos and hugs and smiles and a few tears. It was so unlike American graduation and I really enjoyed it. It was sad to say goodbye to my class though, I am truly so very thankful for everyone in my class 6/13. They were all so kind and welcoming to me and I wish them all the best of luck in college and the years to come! Maybe I will meet you all again one day!

After graduation we were finally allowed to swim in the pool that was built at my school this year! No one was allowed to swim in it even though it's been done for about 2 months now!

Number Four- Lake
After graduation ended and all the goodbyes were said, photos taken, shirts signed and flowers given I headed off into the mountains of Lop Buri with a bunch of other exchange students. We went swimming a large lake about half an hour away from Lop Buri city, it was so much fun and a refreshing way to end a beautiful but saddening day.

Here is the link to my photos of King Narai Palace --> King Narai Festival 2013
Here is the link to my photos of Graduation -->  Pibulwittayalai M6 Graduation <3
(my class is wearing maroon sashes)

Sorry for this post being ridiculously hurried and I apologize for all the mistake I have surely made with my English... I'll write back as soon as I can! Life is crazy busy right now and I'm loving it! Stay healthy and warm in Alaska! And everyone else who is not in Alaska have a great day!

Kearn

กรุงเทพ Bangkok

I wrote this in mid January but never posted it... but here is my unfinished, unedited account of my view out the window as I headed to Bangkok on the public van.

We pass shady little creeks covered in floating leaves and algae, bright green rice fields that fade into the misted distance- you can still make out the trees, light grey shapes in the mist. Two tiny boys sitting by the edge of a river fishing. Then the tall grandeur of a temple. Abundant corn fields, concrete water towers and dump trucks moving rocks causing billows of dust that momentarily obscure my view. Banana trees and little sala's where people sit and wait for a bus or van, one single truck sits out on  the edge of a rice field under a tree... Dusty, large, tall houses with high gates are followed by tiny squat homes made of concrete and sheet metal.

Like I said, unfinished, but maybe it gives you an idea of what it's like to go partway to Bangkok by van.

kearn

Small Packages

I think one of the best things about travelling is also the worst. Travelling leads you to meet so many amazing, wonderful, new people from all over the world, with new and strange ideas and cool senses of humor and different directions in life. In this way, travel is awesome. But, at the end of your conversation, what is there? Perhaps an exchange of emails or facebook names, but this person, these people who you could so easily become fast friends with are gone. Leaving people I suddenly care about and want to know more closely truly breaks my heart.

This is an excerpt from my journal from a few weeks ago when I left the children and volunteers at camp in Chiang Rai. Really though, I think this can be applied to many things. I'm not sure if I have ever mentioned in my blog anything about the two AFS exchange students who I happened to run into a few days before my first day of school... they taught me how to order lunch at the chaotic cafeteria, hugged me when I needed a hug and gave me the advice and encouragement that I needed to be able to realize some things about my own character. My eyes are tearing up while I write this as I remember the day they left... it was almost just like another ordinary day at school except when the final bell rang and we all stood up from our usual seats around the table we could all feel it. This was the last time we would see each other... perhaps forever... or at least, for a very long time. I tried my best not to cry, but of course, I did not succeed. It's now been two months since they left, which seems crazy because looking back, the four months that I knew them was nothing in the scheme of time and life... but I suppose even small things can have a big impact. (Shout out Naomi and Angela, I love you two!) Another example would be English camp, though I stayed with the kids for only two days in my life which is now 6099 days long some of  my most treasured memories were shared with them. I guess my whole point is that sometimes the best presents come in small packages, sometimes seconds can change our lives and sometimes we have to remember to be thankful for what happened rather than sad that it is over.

kearn

Five Stories, Six Months

I've just finished eating breakfast and as I put my dishes in the sink something catches my eye out the window... the building... when I first arrived it was just a foundation and some piles of bricks... now it is more than four stories tall. I see the workers, they look like small ants from here, scurrying to and fro and I watch the building grow. As I stare at this building I realize something else that has changed, it's not my first days here...my first week... my first month... what is it? It's the first day of February. February 2013. This new building, that one I could barely see when I arrived, is going on five stories tall now and me, I'm an oldie. I'm over halfway through this year, it feels like this life is halfway over. My return flight plans are being processed. I'm going on six months next week. It feels strange, it feels sad. Now I know it must seem as if I am being a bit overdramatic, but it feels like yesterday was Thanksgiving and Christmas and suddenly now it is a month after New Years. The time has flown so much and I don't like it. It seems as if at this rate, next week I will be leaving home.

Chiang Rai

"Wherever there is a human in need, there is an opportunity for kindness and to make a difference." -Kevin Heath 

I'm sitting in the consistently shunned middle seat of one of the very back rows of the plane, it wasn't much of a bother to me though because this plane ride was much different than the one I took to come to Thailand, this one was only about an hour. Bap Dtiao. Very short. Chiang Rai back to Bangkok.

The intercom turns off and so do the lights. I look up from my dark, my eyes struggle to adjust to the dark as suddenly the page I am reading is dark, but as I reach up to turn on my overhead light the kindly man next to me smiles and gestures up, he has already seen that I am reading and turned it on for me. Just another show of the simple kindness of the Thais.

I've had a wonderful week travelling, seeing old friends, helping others and learned some about myself but I am tired and I'm ready to be heading home; back to my family and my friends and homemade dinners and my comfortable home.

A week ago I took the ride to Bangkok in the front seat of my Dad's friends little truck, sucking on some strange Thai hard candy, occasionally talking, but mostly staring out the window as we pass houses, rice fields and banana trees. Arriving quite early at the airport I have time to get a foot massage before boarding my plane. Upon arrival in Chiang Rai my friend Mook (exchange student to Alaska last year, Wasilla Sunrise Rotary) and two of her friends are waiting for me at the airport, they even have a welcome sign for me! I see them and wave excitedly but I have to wait for my bag before heading out to meet them.

The next few days are spent travelling and sightseeing in Chiang Rai. To the mountains, to see huge gorgeous gardens, to eat Kao Soi (a very popular Northern Thai food, noodles with curry), to the Golden Triangle, to visit Mook's grandparents, to the famous White Temple (Wat Runkun) and to other interesting sights in Chiang Rai province.

I also got to see Whitney, another exchange student from Alaska who is staying in Chiang Rai and who I haven't seen since we parted at the Bangkok airport over five months ago. It was great to reconnect with her and to be able to share stories as of course coming from the same place we both really understand whats going on for each other.

Friday morning we woke up early to go to Maechan which is a smaller city about 40 minutes away, still in Chiang Rai province. I freely admit that with wet hair in the 15 degree celsius air I was absolutely freezing... and wearing both the coats I have with me in Thailand. (Side note; Ja gap yuu Alaska yangai?! How will I live in Alaska?!)

Anyways we arrived in Maechan just before 9am and Mook and I were both very excited to see Kathleen, a Rotarian from Anchorage, Alaska. We met all the other camp helpers, including Alaskans, Hawaiians, Australians, Chinese and Thais. The camp was at a boarding school for orphaned hill tribe children or hill tribe children who's parent's didn't have the money to give them an education or keep them at home. The children live in dorms at the school and have chores and quite regimented schedules. Children from two other schools also came for the English camp.

There were around seventy kids at the camp and seven groups each having two foreign teachers. The first thing on the first day of camp was to learn who your group was and create a team cheer, name and poster. I was paired with awesome Calethia who is a college student from the US but is studying in Shanghai, China this year. She and I had a fantastic team consisting of kids from all three schools from ages eleven to seventeen. Our team was named Ignite.

Camp consisted of games, listening games, drawing games, competitions, acting, singing, dancing-- lots of dancing, silly faces and lots of fun. Some things were difficult and some simpler but all in all it was a total success.

The first day didn't end until late because we had a special treat for the kids. The Hawaiian Rotarians had brought marshmallows and graham crackers from the US and we taught the kids how to make s'mores. That evening everyone wrote down something the wanted to release from there life and taped it to one of around six paper lanterns then we lit them and watched as our worries, annoyances and negativities floated away on the cool Northern breeze.

Before going home (I stayed at the home of a Thai teacher at the school) that night, one little girl came up to me. It had seemed to me that the day had been very difficult because her English was not very good, I was a bit worried that she was not having fun but all my worries were gone after she spoke to me. She came to me... pulling on my arm gently... "P'Kaohom" which is the polite way for her to call me, "P" because I am older than her. She then proceeded to tell me in Thai how happy she was that I had come and how happy she was she could meet me and the other foreign teachers, she told me she had lots of fun today and she wasn't lonely anymore. Her small voice made a big impact on me. I pulled her into a hug and she more than willingly squeezed her arms around me tightly. Soon other kids came, standing back from us a little bit but watching. Releasing this little girl I opened my arms to the next closest child and hugged her goodnight. Then another and another, they started coming in pairs-- shy at first, I hugged two at a time, they squeezed me tightly and buried there faces in my shirt. I hugged some of them more than once and told them all sweet dreams and that I would see them tomorrow. My parents came to my room and tucked me in each and every night, on my request, probably until I was in something like 7th or 8th grade. So, knowing that they don't have their mom and dad to hug them goodnight everyday is something I cannot even begin to understand... and only makes me appreciate this and so many other small things so, so, so much more. This thing that I cannot understand only wants me to help more, if it takes something as simple as a hug to make a child's life brighter then even if it takes my entire life, I will hug every single orphan on every single continent of the world. I've realized the joy it brings me to be of any comfort to these underprivileged children and I can't wait to be able to help other children.

The second day of camp another little girl came to me, also speaking in Thai she said, "big sister" and pointed at me and "little sister" and pointed at herself, then she hugged me, long and tightly. The end of camp was sad, I knew that next day the kids would go back to their normal lives; school and chores and strict schedules but mostly it was the fact that I had made connections with, laughed and smiled with all of these kids and I wasn't yet ready to leave them.

I suppose the purpose of me going to Kumjornwit school was to teach these children English but really I think the children taught me more than I taught them.

So, anyways, I found myself back on the plane... sitting between a sleepy young woman and kindly old man who turned on my reading light for me. This week I've certainly learned how far a simple act of kindness can go.

Kearney

P.S. Here are some photos, ---> January Photos <--- a few are from Ayuthaya which is a place I went with my family before going to Chiang Rai. It is one of the old capitals of Thailand and is very famous, the following photos of Chiang Rai and of camp.